Dealing with ex husband dating chris botti dating
You’re going to handle it however you’re going to handle it – all I’m doing is sharing my experience with you.
But I can tell you from my experience (both on the giving and receiving end of things), outside opinions are not appreciated.
They’re disrespecting my ability to make a decision based on my evidence and what I see in front of me.
So my opinion is to not respond to whatever his situation is with his ex…
Playing detective or trying to control the other person to prevent them from being able to contact someone is just going to fill that person with resentment and will drain you of energy you could put towards better things… Seriously meditate on this thought: People are going to do whatever they want to do.
No amount of trying to control them, or to “guilt” them, or to reason with them, or to commit to them, etc. Of course your actions matter, but what I’m saying here is that in the end, you can’t control the other person and even if you were able to, it’s much better to know that the other person is going to be the way you want them to be without you having to expend energy on “controlling” them. I stopped trying to be perfect and control everything so I could feel OK.
Generally speaking, though, when you have a relationship with someone, you consider it your relationship with that other person.
At some point, he will ask himself: Is this the woman I want to commit myself to?
The answer will determine whether the relationship deepens or ends.
Then the poor girl would get a text or something from her ex-boyfriend/friend and I would explode into an angry tirade about it.
I regret it – it was destructive and never ever helped my relationship. I handled (because it was my problem, not hers.) The truth is that when I was in that situation, I didn’t manage my fears. It was like, I was so afraid of the idea that she could have been doing something and playing me for a fool that I felt compelled to snuff out any relationship she had that made me uncomfortable.