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But her higher brain functions get in the way, as she has internalized our culture's body shaming.

She has likened me "sticking my nose down there" to "sticking my head in the toilet." Whenever I sexy-talk about licking her, she reacts with a mood killing "eww." But she says she would enjoy it if she could let me. When we have sex, she cuts foreplay short and gets straight to penetration.

First, ask her if she enjoyed oral when she allowed you to go down on her.

We are monogamous for now—I'm open to opening things up down the road—and I didn't see the point of going down there. wasn't the right time to open up our relationship, and he angrily insisted he wasn't trying to do that.

But if we're monogamous and want to stay monogamous, why go into a dark room at all?

I had hooked up with plenty of guys before but I had never used a hook-up app nor had I ever slept with a guy older than 20.

As I felt the doubt creep in I pushed it away with a steel resolve, reminding myself the promise I made.

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    Until now you control every other part of your life, the kind of car you drive, how much money you make, etc.